Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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