I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
