Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
So squirting runs in the family.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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