I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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