you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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