There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
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The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
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So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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