She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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