I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
