I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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