Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
