I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize