Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
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