my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize