She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
