hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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