yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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