I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
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