If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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