yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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