I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
