I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Come on in and take your pants off
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