She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
