How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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