Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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