wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Just high enough for therapy.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
