the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This baby is an asshole
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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