I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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