belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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