And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
