omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
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