I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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