I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
