sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
