I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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