Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
