Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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