My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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