Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
