he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
