I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
