How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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