I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
