If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I am one with the molecules
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize