He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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