It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
