He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
