hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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