Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
