drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I just want to make out with him forever
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