Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
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